The Original Adult Children of Alcoholics 12 Steps of Recovery by Tony A.
In 1979, with the help of Don D., Tony A. wrote his own variation of the AA 12 Steps, which he believed more fitting for adult children and victims of abuse. These steps encouraged taking a “blameless” inventory of the parents and focusing on self-love. During the next 10 years, Tony refined these steps, publishing another version of the Twelve Steps in his 1991 book: “The Laundry List”. In the end, Tony’s version of the Twelve Steps balanced taking a “blameless” inventory of the parents with a focused program of self-love and self-forgiveness.
The AA Adapted Steps for ACA Purposes
1. We admitted we were powerless over the effects of living with alcoholism and that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could bring us clarity.
3. We made a decision to practice self-love and to trust in a Higher Power of our understanding.
4. We made a searching and blameless inventory of our parents because, in essence, we had become them.
5. We admitted to our Higher Power, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our childhood abandonment.
6. We were entirely ready to begin the healing process with the aid of our Higher Power.
7. We humbly asked our Higher Power to help us with our healing process.
8. We became willing to open ourselves to receive the unconditional love of our Higher Power.
9. We became willing to accept our own unconditional love by understanding that our Higher Power loves us unconditionally.
10. We continued to take personal inventory and to love and approve of ourselves.
11. We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power, praying only for knowledge of it’s will for us and the power to carry it out.
12.We have had a spiritual awakening as a result of taking these steps, and we continue to love ourselves and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
source: the book , “The Laundry List” by Tony A.